Archive | Motherhood

Power of the pride – thank you team Annerley & family

Power of the pride – thank you team Annerley & family

Posted on 12 March 2018 by hulda

We have all noticed the international day of women came and went. Like some other special days, it makes me, once again endlessly grateful.

Thanks to some other women, my name was mentioned in one of the articles published in Hong Kong on this day, along with some other women, amazing ones, funnily enough many of which I have been fortunate enough to walk alongside here in this fun city.

The article also mentioned my sister in law, Kristrun Lind, who re-established Annerley Midwives with me, something that not everyone would have been capable of doing. She put in endless hours to help to create what we have today. Annerley had previously been setup as mostly an education and lactation company by Ann Illingworth in 1995, then taken over and changed into a more wide range service clinic – pretty much one of its kind in Hong Kong, where traditionally women either saw a private obstetrician and gave birth in a private hospital, or went to government hospitals and clinics for their care. Private midwives rarely performed routine antenatal care.

Inspiration every day

Inspiration every day

Since then, a lot of water under the bridge and Annerley now offers a wide range of antenatal care, we have an obstetrician who tends to our women and a special shared care programme, NEXUS, that gives families an option of a great continuous care by midwives and obstetricians at a very affordable price. We are just about to publish our clinical outcomes from this programme and we are very excited.

But back to where I started. I remember when I got married in 2001 and I was thanking all my family and friends for all the help they had offered and given me in my life. Right from birth of course, parents and siblings, grandparents and many more – but then ongoing: I would never have finished school, university and my postgraduate midwifery degree, had it not been for my sister Rebekka for example, help from friends and family that babysat, fed, offered lodgings, cars, money and more and more – for years. Other friends who are always there, on the phone if not in person, always willing, listening, practical, loving and just there.

I also would never have survived here in Hong Kong, had it not been for all the friends and families that came through Annerley, all the staff that I have been fortunate to been surrounded by. I don’t think anyone can really imagine what it is to run a little business like this, that is so dependent on that everyone puts in their best and that – when nature rules what time babies are born, everyone is emotional, happy, helpless, sad, – the whole lot, many times over during the months of the parenting journey – completely depends on the whole team to be amazingly committed.
Families of those employees, the midwives, team in our office, they also have had their share. There are phone-calls, strange working hours and discussions about stuff that none of them really would love to hear. But they put up with it and fortunately I think I can say that most of the time our little team is a happy one.

Since 2001 in my marriage speech, I have many times stood in front of crowds and written blogs like this. All quite similar. About the same people.

And I can never say it enough. Women and men, – there are so many around me that I really cannot thank enough. People who stand by me and I want to say to that I will always, too, stand by you.

Sometimes this is obvious, sometimes it is not. But it is there. The it. Believe in it, lean into it, feel it. I really hope that one day, I can return all those favors, love and generosity, not that anyone seems to be counting.

I have had a tough year myself. I divorced and my whole family has suffered. We all try to make it work though and in my 45th year of living, I am making it my passion to try and live in peace and harmony and try to make the world a little better than when I came into it.
With the help of all these wonderful role-models around me, I would never be able to think that way. Of course, on the darkest days, it is even hard. But I am so lucky to be able to always be knocked into a beautiful path, if ever I seem to wander out of it. By you all, beautifulies. My family is an amazing one. Unusual and strange I suppose, but I am so glad to be in it. My birth family and my Annerley family.

“The power of the pride” – our little team mantra, this one led by the only man in our Annerley team. We are all there to support each other, to support families, who then support each other and so it goes.

Power of the pride

Power of the pride

I would like to dedicate my song on this day to my beautiful daughter Freyja, who is my inspiration every day. If we could all just be like her, the sun would always shine. Happy (just after) international day to all women in this world.

From the forever grateful mum and midwife,

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Silver Nursing Cups

Silver Nursing Cups

Posted on 06 November 2017 by Kristrun

silverettesphotoI have been a midwife for many years in the UK and have had clients trying a variety of creams and strategies for healing their sore, cracked or bleeding nipples. However, it wasn’t until I started working at Annerley, that I became aware of Silverettes (or Breast Angels).

Silverettes are made in Italy from silver 925 and they are little magical nipple covers. Silver has natural antibacterial and disinfecting properties. helping to prevent infection and the moist healing environment aids with fast healing of damaged nipples. To use – just squirt a little of your breast milk into the cup and place over your nipple, inside your bra, between feeds.

The breastmilk inside the cups helps with moist healing and the cup prevents rubbing and irritation from clothing.

No need for any other creams or products so nothing is being ingested by baby.

Extremely hygienic – clean with a little water and bicarbonate of sod, and air dry.

Eco-friendly – can be safely passed on to other mums after you have finished with them. Or keep for your next baby.

Sore nipples can often be a result of poor positioning of baby at the breast and then the help from a certified IBCLC lactation consultant is invaluable. I have seen first hand the (sometimes miraculous) difference these little silver cups can make within a few days, accompanied by correction of baby’s position and latch at the breast.

Sue x

Sue Pollard is a registered midwife and IBCLC lactation consultant at Annerley the midwives clinic

Silverettes can be bought directly from the Breast Angels UK website or from us in our clinic shop – see here for details.

Give us a call to make sure we have some on the shelf as we regularly sell out!

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10 Top Tips for New Parents – Sue shares her advice in ‘Around DB’ magazine

10 Top Tips for New Parents – Sue shares her advice in ‘Around DB’ magazine

Posted on 06 November 2017 by Kristrun

Becoming a parent is a life-changing event to say the least. Add in sleep deprivation, sore breasts, cramping and a demanding newborn, and it’s no wonder new parents struggle at times. Here are 10 tips to help keep mum, dad and baby healthy through the first few weeks. If your spouse snores at night and you’re having a hard time sleeping at night get some comfortable ear plugs for sleeping to help block out the snoring.

Organic, NonToxic & Pregnancy Safe Nail Polish

Using non-toxic and pregnancy safe products on our Moms is a high priority at Becoming Mom Spa + Ultrasound. The skin is your body’s largest organ and absorbs every lotion, oil, and cream you expose it to. Including organic, pregnancy-safe nail polish! here can find services before you are pregnant, during your pregnancy and after you deliver your baby.

1. Expect that you will fit around the baby’s needs, and not the other way around. Don’t put undue pressure on yourself to keep to your old routine.

2. Sleep when the baby sleeps—Facebook can wait. A proper rest will leave you feeling refreshed and better able to cope when the baby wakes.

3. Accept help when it is offered. Although many people in Hong Kong are fortunate enough to employ domestic helpers, there are still times that you need that extra pair of hands from a friend.

4. Sit in front of the TV with the family while feeding. You don’t need to live in the bedroom for months!

5. Go out for gentle walks. Getting out is good for you both physically and mentally, but halve the distance you think you can walk—your body has been through a lot!

6. Eat and drink well. Have healthy snacks and a bottle of water nearby when feeding. Give your body the nutrients that it needs to cope with the demands being placed on it.

7. Babies cry. Accept it.

8. There is no magic formula for sleeping and feeding routines. There are, however, many wealthy book authors.

9. Listen to the friendly, contradicting advice of friends and relatives, then take what you want and disregard the rest.

10. Babies are tiny for such a short time. Enjoy them. Remember everything is just a phase.

To read the full article in Around DB – click here

Sue is a registered midwife and lactation consultant and she and our other midwives are available for office consultation, home visits as well as teaching group antenatal classes at Annerley. Please call 29831558 or visit for more details.

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How many layers? Midwife Michelle shares her advice

How many layers? Midwife Michelle shares her advice

Posted on 08 June 2017 by Kristrun

MichelleRescoNew parents are often unsure about room temperature and what to dress a baby in at night.

Current guidelines for room temperature recommend a temperature between 18-22 degrees. This might seem a bit cool but overheating is known to be a risk factor when it comes to SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome).

A comfortable body temperature for a baby is around 36.5-37.5°C. The easiest way (especially in the middle of the night) to assess if your baby is too hot or cold is by placing your hand on the back of their neck, just at the top of their shoulders. Baby’s skin temperature should feel just right/warm to the touch. If too hot or clammy then remove a layer, too cool – add a layer. Hands and feet commonly feel cool and as such should not be used as a measure for checking baby’s temperature.

Don’t put a hat on your baby at night as any excess heat is released though their head. When babies get too hot they also tend to place their arms up above their head to let heat escape, hence swaddling the arms down inside a wrap if the room is too warm can cause them to overheat. If your baby needs a swaddle to help them settle, try gradually swaddling to a lower point on their body so that eventually just the torso is swaddled leaving the arms free.

For clothing, add one extra layer of clothing than you would be comfortable wearing in bed. Remember if you have a ductless air conditioner on you will likely have a duvet or blankets to keep off the chill, so your baby will need a cover too. Make sure to sleep baby on their back at the bottom of the cot (babies feet to the bottom) and if using a cover tuck it in securely at the edges of the cot so that it is just up to the level under their armpits. Tucking the sheet like this will prevent it from rising up over your baby’s face.

As a general guide:

In room temperature of 18°C your baby will need a sheet and two blankets,

In room temperature of 20-22°C your baby will need a sheet and one blanket.

If you’re struggling to keep the room temperature below 23°C your baby will likely need a sheet only.
Statistics and heat distribution numbers sourced:


Happy sleeping

Michelle Resco, Annerley Midwife

If you would like more advise from our midwives, you can book a private consultation or pop along to our Baby & Breastfeeding clinic on Tuesday and Thursday mornings.

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Make Hong Kong your village

Make Hong Kong your village

Posted on 22 November 2016 by hulda

When I had my first two kids, I lived in a village.  Most mornings I walked to the bakery and bought fresh breads and had coffee while I watched the fellow villagers pass by and my baby slept in the pram.  Then it was the swimming pool where it was perfect to go for a soak where the older one could sit by himself and the other one was attached to me. Friends would gather there with their kids at the same time each morning usually. Sometimes it was quite hard work when there were two of them (14 months apart), pushing the pram in the 20 cm high snow.  I managed to get a seat to attach on top of the pram, so that one could sit there while the other one slept.  For lunch, luckily, the village was so small that my husband could come home and we all had lunch together and then one of the kids neatly would vomit on his jacket before he set off again for work at 1pm.


New mum

It takes a village

We usually slept in if the kids allowed it.  Everyone woke a little when my husband went to work but then we all continued to sleep a little longer because we had after all woken twice to feed in the middle of the night so we were tired.  It was not like there was anything particular that needed to be done, aside from the housework, which I have no memory of enjoying, but somehow mostly managed to do. I think my father in law found my lack of housewife skills slightly alarming, but probably also understood that when people are tired, doing the dishes is not priority.


Sure, it was sometimes tough.  Breastfeeding was not easy.  Guilt.  Going to the gym?  Tell me another joke.  The first time I went to the volleyball exercise that I had wanted to do for so long my 18 month old son ate 20 contraception pills that I of course was taking (as not wanting to have three kids in 3 years), pills that I thought I kept well stored in the bathroom cabinet.  But he had no problem climbing up there.  The doctor, when I called him, told me “well he might develop boobs”.


What was so good about the village then? 

Well, people somehow look after you.  They notice when you don’t show up in the pool many days in a row, or in the mummy mornings on Wednesdays.  They pop in unannounced and have a short coffee.  Your family and friends sometimes babysit.  People care.  Distance is short, so time spent on traveling is short. You meet your family for lunch.  And so it goes. Even when it snows, you still go out with the kids, just for the fresh air or change of scene.


I meet many mums who are semi-happy in Hong Kong.  They find life here difficult.  The taxis are not fitted for car seats.  The heat. The rain.  The steps.  The people on the streets.  The urban setting.  Long workdays are not family friendly.  “Well you know, it is Hong Kong” – they say.  This is why it is important to find the village side of Hong Kong.  It is true that many things here are not easy.  Maternity leave here is short and paternity leave hardly exists.  Plus, no matter where you live, life can be pretty tough with a newborn.  But there are things to do that can make our big city a village too, and somehow we seem to forget it at times.


  1. Take it easy.  A confinement period is not so silly to do.  You may want to adjust it to your needs, but Hello Magazine offers a very unrealistic picture of the new mother, all perfect and busy straight after birth.
  2. Sleep in. Wake up if you want if you have a partner that is going to work, but then try and get a few more minutes in bed if you are tired.  After all, there may be help with the housework.
  3. Once you feel ready, go out every day, at least once.  Is there a swimming pool in your building or district?  Around 4 weeks after birth you can go and at least enjoy the outdoors, and soon enough dip in.
  4. Too hot by the pool, even if you are in it?  Why not find a windier place.  The circle around the Peak for example, or the promenade in central or Pok Fu Lam, – or any promenade for that matter. Babies tend to sleep very well in prams.
  5. If you live close to one, beaches tend to have wind too.
  6. After the first weeks, meet your partner for lunch.  Every day.  Or every other day. He/she too, needs to eat.
  7. Have an afternoon nap.
  8. Meet a friend regularly, within slightly flexible timeslots though.  Someone who also has a baby and is understanding of how long it may take to get out of the house.  Great it if it someone that you can walk to meet.
  9. But on that, have a bag ready by the door with all the things needed for an outing with a baby and just leave, when you want to.  No “what if he needs to feed”.  Just go.
  10. Give yourself time to be not-so-perfect.  Take one day at a time and do little things that please you.
  11. Taxis do fit car seats.  It just takes you one extra minute to fit them in than it would in Melbourne.
  12. And yes the baby gets hot in a carrier. But that does not mean you cannot go out, just do short walks at a time.
  13. It is also perfectly acceptable, if you like it, do do nothing for days, except just enjoy your baby at home.
  14. Dinner is often more enjoyable if the appetizer is given, then baby is fed, then the meal is had.  Otherwise you may spend the whole dinner trying to settle a half hungry, half tired baby.
  15. The baby needs very little stimulation from classes and hangouts.  It just really needs you.  So pick your activities based on what you enjoy doing. A happy parent usually makes a happy baby.


The truth is that sometimes you have to create the life you want to live.  Find ways to be balanced and happy as a person, mother, in your family.  Pregnancy, birth and the period after often throws unexpected challenges at us and it can be easy to not see simple solutions that will make life more enjoyable.  Latest research shows us that the infant years have very strong effects on our lives later on.  It is hugely important to be alerted and alarmed, equipped and supported so that postnatal depression will not develop, or if it does, to be able to seek help and assistance as easily as possible.

For some the strongest prevention is ordinary life, in a village, with kind people in it.  That village may have to be created by you.  But it is worth it.

Hulda Thorey – midwife

November 2016

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My baby is crying

My baby is crying

Posted on 04 August 2016 by Kristrun

crying baby tongueOne way for a new-born baby is to express him/her is through cry, and therefore crying is considered normal. Usually there is a reason for why the new-born cries however; he/she is telling us that something is wrong: hunger, tiredness, wet diaper, cold, pain, – or most commonly that he/she just wants you to be there.

Different types of cry:
Although sometimes this is hard in the beginning, parents usually quickly learn to know different types of cry. The cry because of hunger somehow sounds different from the cry from someone that wants attention. Some babies cry more than others and some stop immediately when you either pick them up or feed them, while others will always take time to recover.

What should you do?
Even though your baby does not stop crying immediately when you cuddle him/her, they can still feel the security of your presence, and often this is what they are really longing for, just like kittens do when they cuddle up with their mum in the early days.
If the cry does not stop, you can try to change the nappy, or see if the baby is either too hot or cold. Of course hunger is also often the reason for cry, and you must ensure that the baby has been fed well. If you have difficulties knowing when the baby has fed enough, you can always contact the midwife or lactation consultant to help you out.

If your baby cries without any obvious reason for extended periods (more than an hour or two and does not stop), you should have a doctor’s appointment to ensure nothing is seriously wrong, such as an ear infection or an accidental fall or injury.

Colic, is a condition that requires a lot of patience and support from everyone in the family, since often there is little that can be done to fix the problem, except for waiting for the baby to develop, and whilst doing so, to find different settling ways that might help. When there is colic (crying on and off more or less every day at the same time of the day for 1 – 3 hours) present – I would suggest that you come to the baby clinic or see the midwives/health visitor to help you to identify this for sure. But should this be the case, usually the best solution is to keep the baby as close to you as possible, – you will end up with lots of cuddles, tummy time, chest time and usually a sling. Mum or dad can of course both do this. A pacifier is sometimes helpful and movement usually helps.

Parents often feel real helpless when their baby cries a lot, and they find it difficult to continuously try to find ways to settle the crying new-born – and often cannot find why the cry is there. Again, best way is to be patient and try different positions, walk around and talk to the baby, have the baby in a slightly upright position or even lying on its front on your chest. If you find that you simply need a break, ask your partner, a friend or your helper to give you a little time off, where you leave the apartment and try to catch your breath for a few minutes. To take a baby outside or change the environment often works like magic. But time passing is what eventually helps and the problem is usually solved on its own around 3 months. As it can be hard to wait it may be useful to speak with other mums and dads, come to playgroups and the well-baby clinic to share your experiences – often when learning others are going through the same, it somehow makes the problem a little less hard to deal with.

What NOT to do:
You should NEVER shake your baby, no matter how angry/tired/annoyed you are. This can cause extreme danger to the baby. If you feel like doing something like this, put the baby down immediately, walk out of the room, close the door and either have someone else caring for the child while you calm down, or just leave it for some moments if no one is around to help you. Call a friend or family member. Enter the room again when you feel that you have calmed down, and try not to feel guilty, this is something that many parents experience at some point in their parenthood, but the main thing is to deal with the situation in the correct way.

Is it healthy for the baby to cry?
In the old days this was a common belief, and thought to strengthen babies´ lungs. There is a possibility that there is some truth in this, especially in the first days of their lives when they need to get rid of extra fluid in their lungs after being in the uterus. However, parents should always respond to their baby’s cry and try to figure out why the baby is crying. Babies should not be left crying for a long time, they need tender, love and care so that they may develop trust for their parents and the feeling that someone is always there for them.

2015/ Annerley – Hulda Thorey

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Why is my child not willing to share?

Why is my child not willing to share?

Posted on 10 May 2016 by Annerley

Untitled design-1Toddlers arguing over toys – a common scene at playgroups and playdates. The crying, the drama, the ensuing tantrums… is it all just an inevitable part of toddlerhood or is there something we can do?

If your child is less than 5 years old, the explanation can be very simple – she is just not ready to share. Most toddlers aged two and under have no understanding of sharing at all and others will take a lot longer to understand the concept. In some cases, with some special toys for example, they may never be ready. It may help you to think of this from the child’s perspective – try to imagine if someone asked for your handbag or phone and you had to hand it to someone (maybe even a stranger) willingly and without objection.

Most toddlers will eventually learn how to share most toys. However it’s a good idea to allow them to keep their special toys separate and not to expect them to share those things they are particularly attached to. Why not go through their toys before someone comes over for a playdate and put out toys that are ok to be shared – and keep the other toys at a safe distance or simply explain that this particular toy will not be shared. Do this with your child. You may just find this makes for a far more peaceful playtime.

My toddler is fighting with another toddler over a toy. How do I deal with this?

Distraction is the simplest answer. The attention span of a toddler is normally very short. Take your child and find something else to look at – “look, a bird” – and swing away from the situation. Don’t dwell on it and don’t waste time or energy making him say sorry – most toddlers will not understand that either. You of course should apologize and your child will eventually copy your behaviour and learn to say sorry in due course. When the same scenario comes up again – simply repeat.

The best way to encourage children to share is to praise them for when they do share. It will happen – do it quickly when you see it and try to do it regularly. By praising them for positive behaviour they will be a lot more likely to do it again. They will gradually want to please parents and caregivers more than anything else.

Most children will develop the concept of sharing very quickly when they start Kindergarten or any sort of similar group activity. They will very quickly copy the behaviour from their peers and teachers. So, one way of dealing with the issue of sharing is to simply wait.

Best of luck

Kristrun Lind

B.Ed, M. Ed. (Iceland, HK) C.E.C.E. (HK)

Kristrun teaches a workshop at Annerley – Understanding your toddler.  Consultation with the our consultants and midwives, available on Skype (face time or other platforms), over the phone or in the office. Click here to book. More information about our services on our website.

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Toddlers and tantrums

Toddlers and tantrums

Posted on 05 February 2016 by Kristrun

10979573_773162599400229_762771788_nIt’s very common for toddlers to throw what we commonly think of as “tantrums”. They start crying or shouting or screaming and seem like they are out of control. They bang their heads against the floor, roll on the floor, hit something or someone etc. With the help of KLA Schools, my toddler never hit it’s head on a wall and they give a lot of safety and better education. But why do they do it and what can we do about it?

They do it because they can not express themselves clearly – they have not developed the skills to do this and they just simply cannot get a handle on their emotions. They do it because they start crying and they cannot gain back the control – even if they want to. They do it because they are tired or hungry, or just grumpy. It’s a frustration overload, sometimes mild and sometimes a bit scary – they can be short of breath, vomit or look like they are suffocating.

But what do they need?

They need you. They need a hug, they need a cuddle. They need comfort and perhaps food and rest. Put the toddler on the sofa or your bed if you are in the home. Sit down with him and cuddle if that works or just stay at a very safe distance. Don’t laugh at her, just talk to her in a soothing tone. Rub her back or feet – if she allows you. She will calm down and relax. If you are out and about, try to pick up your toddler and comfort him – hopefully where you can sit down or find a quiet spot.

Once the scene is over – and if the toddler is old enough – you might use the opportunity to explain why this type of behaviour is not a great way to solve problems and get your way. But don’t dwell on it – just explain quickly.

And don’t worry. Over time your child will learn how to express herself and connect with her feelings and things will become much more manageable.



B.Ed, M. Ed. (Iceland, HK) C.E.C.E. (HK)

Do you want to know more? Consultation with the midwives, available on Skype (face time or other platforms), over the phone or in the office. Click here to book. More information about our services on our website.

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Breastfeeding was hard for me too

Breastfeeding was hard for me too

Posted on 09 January 2016 by hulda

Sometimes I think back about why I managed to breastfeed my babies, despite the fact that I had nipple pain for weeks with each one of them, little milk overall and always went to work reasonably early after giving birth.  I have come to the conclusion that it was because of a few things that I was lucky to have – mainly the environment that I was in and the mindset of the people around me.

Everyone just does it, in Iceland.  In my home country, 79% of women still breastfeed at 5 months, although this number is today even higher, 35% of them exclusively do so.  Two thirds of women exclusively breastfeed for the first two months and pretty much everywhere you go, it would not be considered inappropriate to breastfeed. In hospitals, no-one ever asks you if you are going to breastfeed, it is just assumed that you will.


Breastfeeding in Iceland 2004 to 2008


It is done reasonably discretely, boobs are not just visible to everyone, but even in a meeting or a coffee break at work, a breastfeeding mother would not be inappropriate, as long as she otherwise is doing her job.  Pumping milk is not that common, women just breastfeed.  When they want to go somewhere, the milk travels with them, so planning is not all that important.  “The baby should not feed for at least another hour” – is not a sentence you would hear often in Iceland.  You just feed when the baby needs feeding.  Who wants a baby to cry when it is easy to stop it?  It is true that the maternity leave is longer there, so it is easier for that reason.  But the great emphasis on “is the baby getting enough?” is definitely not as common in Scandinavia as it is in Hong Kong.

When I started to work in Hong Kong after having my 3rd and 4th babies, I had so little breastmilk, i.e. there was exactly as much milk as they needed but not really a drop more, I could have easily have been totally discouraged by it.  I never was able to pump more than 60 ml of milk when I was trying to store milk for them in advance of working.  But I just decided to try it out.  It turned out that they adjusted to it just fine.  And then came solid food and on weekends there was catching up that was lovely for us all.  But the health clinics were certainly not very helpful in supporting this system, I must say.

The other thing that helped me, was the fact that I did in fact have very good knowledge and some skills in breastfeeding, through my work.  In Iceland, the midwives’ training includes academic study and then weeks of breastfeeding assistance on the postnatal wards and during homevisits, to be able to sit your midwife exams.  This has of course greatly contributed to the support that the mothers in Iceland are getting and the statistics reflect that.  However, it is of course different when it is your own body and baby, and we all need some form of support.  So I was lucky, that I had this, offered by the government.

Yet another part was the general mindset of not bothering with the details.

When you read about that you must cover the whole areola and that you must fully empty a breast, feed for certain amount of time etc.  -  although all of these are valid advise, you can easily get a bit hooked on this and worry that you are not doing it right.  Especially if the baby is unhappy and crying, other family members have other opinions or generally the feeling when feeding, is not good.  Areolas are greatly different between women and some women have a fast letdown reflex and plenty of milk, so their feeds take a very short time, whereas others take much longer to drain breasts to the baby’s needs.

So when you can -  take the advice and educate yourself, but then use it appropriately. For example in my case, I really had to swap between the breasts often to keep one of my babies happy.  Otherwise she would simply fall asleep and then be hungry shortly after.  But when I swapped, she was much happier.  I made sure to try and empty one of the breast at least, each time, but this again, is sometimes hard to evaluate, when you are a first time mother.  ‘Empty’ to me, was a rather difficult concept – are the breasts ever empty?  My other kids would feed more “typically” i.e. all of the standard breastfeeding advice was very appropriate and useful. But flexibility was needed.

The same goes for foremilk and hindmilk - often it seemed hard to know when it was long enough a feed to be considered to be giving hindmilk.  But when I stopped agonizing over these details, and rather focus on the baby and how she responded, gained weight and slept – then it was all a bit easier.  The information was useful, but I needed to step away from it and be able to just try and test what worked.

And one last thing – the position to feed from.  Basically, especially when I once almost had mastitis after being with another woman in labour for 20 hours, what really did the trick was to feed the baby in ALL sorts of positions.  I mean, almost nothing short of a headstand.  In the bathtub, on the sofa, in a chair, leaning over her completely, upside down on the bed – the whole lot, many times over.

Being able to extend the night by feeding lying down in bed with the baby – what a glorious thing! If someone had come and told me off for co-sleeping, I am not sure what I would have done.  But luckily, no one would have even dared to so so!

A good midwife or a lactation consultant will tell you all of this.  You can read about it too.

To actually do it, though, and release the ‘strictness’ and let go of how you ‘should’ do things, is something you must do yourself.

This is just my story, I hope it helps you.  Let’s try and make Hong Kong more like Iceland and Scandinavia, where breastfeeding is just simply no big deal, women can do it their own way, whenever and wherever they want to, based on the baby’s needs.

Hulda x


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Bonding with Your Baby during the 4th Trimester: Published in Sassy Mama

Bonding with Your Baby during the 4th Trimester: Published in Sassy Mama

Posted on 23 December 2015 by Kristrun

fourthTrimester“In the fourth trimester – the first weeks after the baby is born and is at home with you – there are many things you can do to make the transition easier and less stressful for both you and the baby and the family as a whole. Always keep in mind that the baby is adjusting and learning and finding its own feet and for the time being, the parents are its link to being able to do so. The baby relies on you 100 percent and tries to message you in the best way it possibly can. If you ignore or rush too much through those signals, or perhaps follow advice from others who are maybe not in the same situation, it may well result in a stressful situation, more cries from the baby and a delayed bonding between the two of you.”

Hulda -

To read the full article on Sassy Mama - click here

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