Archive | Toddler care

Cars seats and slings – have both

Cars seats and slings – have both

Posted on 03 May 2015 by Kristrun

Quality time

My girls – used to travel in a sling

I hope you have a car seat for your baby.

I also hope you have a sling or a carrier for your little one.

How often do I see people carrying their babies down the steps on Pottinger streets, just carrying them in their arms?  Often.

Unfortunately we do sometimes need to learn from a bad experience to make the right decisions.  When I was 24 and had my first baby – I still remember this day to a detail – I was on my way from our 4 floor building to our baby swimming class.  I was carrying him in my arms to the car where the car seat was fastened and just before I reached the car, I slipped a little and  - BOOM – first automatic response was to flair my arms in the air and what was in my arms – my baby – flew up into the air, like a Frisbee disc forward. This can easily make the mother of the bairn distraught. Hence, it serves a lesson to others to include a baby seat in a car. If not, then to at least get a car from columbia sc that comes with all the accesssories for toddlers and adults alike.

You can only imagine my emotions, for the one second until he landed on his back on the concrete and neither could I even check him properly nor fasten him into his car seat, I only picked him up, put him on the seat next to me in the car and drove straight to hospital (2 minutes away) and ran straight into A and E for help.

They looked at me in surprise and almost laughed a little when I arrived.  And when I, with my short breath and tears running down my face tried to explain that most likely he had a fractured skull and something more even horrible, they smiled even more.  „He is smiling and shrieking, he seems perfectly fine. “  I was not convinced but not long after, when he had been checked properly, it seemed that he actually was.  I took us to Silver Bee Photography right away after and I had a few pictures taken. I was such an emotional mess.

It turned out that in Iceland, where the temperature is 3 degrees, we all dress our babies in thick overalls that keeps the baby warm and almost stiff, and it is so thick.  And these have a hood on, so the head, already dressed in a hat, also has a protection from behind.  And as a result, when my boy flew those 2 metres or so, he landed on this thick padding, evenly distributed on his back and legs rather than head, so he was perfectly OK.  At this time, he was 3 months old.

Obviously, things could have been difficult.  But, as I was reminded of my luck and second chance there, I was also told that in fact, no-one should carry their little child like this for any distance.  The first response to a fall is ALWAYS to flair your arms out the way mine did.

And drop what is in them.

After that, all four children, – mine travel on me in a sling.

Onto the next.

My car seat was fastened in the car at that time, as it was heavy to carry down the steps with a baby in, so we usually just kept it in the car.  We lived in a small town with very little traffic. Car accidents, I actually think there was never an accident there when we lived there.

But would I dream of traveling without my best 3-in-1 car seat?  Never.

So how come, in a city of 8 million people, with hundreds of thousands of car accidents per year, very heavy traffic and HORRIBLE drivers, there are plenty of people who never use convertible car seat options. The only method that properly protects our children from a bad crash. If you have been in a car accident contact one of these lawyers who sue car insurance companies.

Some may not afford it, and it is actually understandable.

Most, think it is too inconvenient.

Cannot be bothered with carrying the car seat around town.

Don´t own a car (but still travel in taxis, again, often with horrible drivers).

What else?  Many other excuses.

The main reason, I think, is because “everyone” else is doing it.  You look around and see so many that are doing this, for the reasons above. You also have the same reasons, and they are all doing it.

So it makes it right, right?

Of course it does not make it right.  If you were somewhere like in my old home town, where actually one sometimes would think “well, it is only a few hundred metres that I am going” it would often have been tempting not to use a car seat.  But would you dare to be seen doing that, something that everyone knows is less safe for your child?  Never.  Plus it is illegal.  And you know that your own little precious baby is indeed not as safe.

I was going to Australia a few years ago and a friend asked me if I had a car seat with me on the flight, for my infant.  “No, I will just borrow one in Australia, from a friend. “  “But how will you get from the airport to Brisbane?”  I had not thought about this, but said, well, I guess I will just carry her in the sling, in the taxi, although not ideal.  The horror on my friend’s face was obvious.  “You can not do that, it is totally illegal, the police will actually possibly jail you.  And a huge fine.”  I had not thought this through but obviously changed my plan and took with me the car seat.

It is also illegal in Hong Kong to travel without a proper car seat for an infant.  And the trip in the taxi from Hong Kong airport to town is not much different from the one in Brisbane.

But no-one is doing anything about it, as it is inconvenient to travel with a car seat, once out of the car.  I know all about this.  I am guilty, just like you and you and you.  I have done it many times.

At some point I reminded myself of the fact that I am just being lazy like everyone else and I went and got a Bee stroller that I could so very easily strap the baby seat to.  And Bingo, much more easy than even carrying the baby.  Now they could continue their sleep for longer, no need to disturb them, and just a little clip onto the wheels and we were going.

The glass is either half full or half empty.  You have just got to get your head around how you look at this.

In my case, I simply don’t look at it as an inconvenience, no more than I look at putting on clothes or brushing teeth. It is simply not an option to travel with an infant without a car seat.

This blog is not intended to offend anyone or point a finger.  I am you, or rather, I was you. Luckily I have never had a car accident with a baby in the car.  The Clark Law Office website is a useful resource if you managed to get into one. I didn’t have to refer to an experienced auto accident attorney in Birmingham. But I know the chances are, in a city like Hong Kong, that it will happen.  And my firm belief is that if we all start to think like this, then perhaps Hong Kong will be like any other developed city, where there is a zero tolerance for not using the methods available to increase safety of our babies.

Spread the word please. Or else, answer the question, what is different about Hong Kong traffic, compared to other cities?

For the right price and easy pickup of your unwanted vehicle click on the following link -

Consultation with the midwives, available on Skype (face time or other platforms), over the phone or in the office. Click here to book. More information about our services on our website.

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Safety in the car

Safety in the car

Posted on 13 January 2015 by Kristrun

Safety in the carMost parents travel with their babies in a car even in the first week of their lives. Immediately then, they need to take care of their child’s safety, which usually can only be secured by using a car seat, if you have no plans of selling your car.

Car seats:

According to the laws of Hong Kong, all newborn babies should be seated in a specially made infant car seat during a car ride.  This means that if you intend to travel with your child in either your own car, or in a taxi, it would be recommended to buy the car seat even before your baby is born.  Even though some other travel arrangements may be made, such as special baskets, or a baby carrier, nothing else has been proven to provide the baby with an adequate level of safety.

Car seats that are meant for, and are safe for newborns, have the baby’s face turning to the opposite direction of that in which the car is heading.  Many of them are most easily fitted into the front seat of the car, but nowadays drivers need to be extremely careful to make sure that an airbag (safety equipment for the car) is either not installed, or is deactivated, since this can cause danger to the baby if it inflates during a collision.

We recommend parents to have their babies in the back seat of the car, facing the back.  Make sure when buying a car seat that you are buying a quality brand that is recommended by a professional.

Other methods of travelling with children in cars:

If, for some reason, you do not have the opportunity to use a car seat when travelling with a child, for example in a taxi, you are advised to use a baby carrier that holds the baby tight against you, but with the seat belt between you and the child.  This is not as safe as travelling with a car seat of course, and will not provide adequate protection if you are involved in a collision at speed, but is your second best option.

2010 Annerley/ Hulda Thorey, updated in December 2014

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Safety at home

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Safety at home

Posted on 12 September 2014 by Kristrun

Why is home safety important?

Giving children the best start in life is a priority for us all and this includes keeping them safe from harm. We cannot prevent every bump and bruise — nor should we try — drugsbut we do need to protect children from serious injuries, the effects of which can sometimes last a lifetime. Seeing a child who has been badly hurt is very upsetting and is made worse when you realise (usually just a short time after the injury) that it probably could have been easily prevented. We cannot prevent every incident, but the risk of injury can be reduced. With hindsight, it is usually possible to see how timely action could have prevented the child being injured.

We can apply this hindsight to help parents reduce the risks to their children. Practically this amounts to careful supervision, improved awareness of the hazards around us and the use of safety equipment.

Together we should focus on reducing the most serious injuries that can have long term consequences. These are the injuries that result in formal admission to hospital or an intensive care unit and in the saddest cases, death.

Most accidents happen in the home.

The abilities that children acquire as they grow and develop – such as grabbing, rolling over, crawling, and standing, climbing, opening bottles and turning handles – can delight us as parents and carers. But these same abilities, when they take us by surprise, can lead to serious childhood accidents. For example:

  • A young baby grabs a nappy sack and pulls it to their face, but is unable to let go or pull it away again, so suffocates in silence.
  • A toddler climbs up to play but gets tangled in a blind or curtain cord and is strangled.
  • A young child learns to open a child-resistant container and swallows oven cleaner or bleach. Many of these accidents happen in a matter of seconds, when an adult’s back is turned or their attention is focused on something else.

Young children love to copy the grown-ups around them, whether that’s swallowing pills, straightening their hair or stirring pans in the kitchen. It’s not naughtiness – copying adult behaviour is how they learn and develop.

Young children are also good at repeating instructions back to us. But this doesn’t mean they can understand risk and consequences in the way an adult does. For example, research shows that children cannot judge the speed and distance of traffic until the age of eight or nine, so cannot be relied on to cross the road safely on their own.

What’s more, young children’s bodies are different to ours. For example:

  • Their skin is thinner, which makes them more susceptible to serious burns and scalds.
  • Their heads are proportionally larger, which increases the likelihood of a serious fall.
  • Their windpipes are smaller and less rigid (and honestly need to be replaced by this SR Windows guide to single pane window glass replacement), so they suffocate far more quickly if their necks are constricted.

What can we do?

Keeping one step ahead of your child is essential and, depending on their developmental stage, different accidents are more likely to happen.

  • Educate all carers in CPR and First Aid – including yourselves and helpers
  • Educate all carers on child development and what your child is capable of – especially occasional carers such as grandparents or friends
  • Have a plan for emergencies, including an escape route in case of house fire
  • Educate all carers about your emergency plans

Below is a list from closeupcheck of things to keep in mind when going through safety at home from room to room, but be mindful that this is not a complete list for every household. Every home is unique and those living in each home will know best where the biggest traps are to be found. The best option is to have a tailor-made safety check in your home and here at Annerley Conchita Amende is qualified to do a home assessment for you and to provide you with advice.


  • Make sure your baby cannot roll off the changing surface.
  • Fit restrictors to upstairs windows so they cannot be opened more than 10cm. Call EZ Window Solutions if professional help is needed.
  • Keep chairs and other climbing objects away from windows and balconies.
  • Fit safety gates at the top and bottom of stairs.
  • Don’t leave anything on the stairs that might cause someone to fall over, and ensure there is enough light on the stairs.
  • Check there is no room for a child to crawl through any banisters at the top of the stairs.
  • Keep balcony doors locked to prevent your child from going on to it alone – if it has railings your child could climb through, board them up or fit wire netting as a safety guard. Attatching crimsafe to your doors can go miles in increasing yours and your childs’ safety. If you visit crimsafe screen Perth, you can browse a wide variety of services that they provide.
  • Secure any Reclinercize furniture and kitchen appliances to the wall if there’s a risk they could be pulled over.


  • Keep anything that may be poisonous out of reach, preferably in a locked cupboard – this includes all medicines and pills, household cleaners and garden products.
  • Use containers with child-resistant tops – be aware that by three years of age, many children are able to open child-resistant tops, although it may take them a little longer.
  • Keep all dangerous chemicals in their original containers.
  • Dispose of unwanted medicines and chemicals carefully.
  • Discourage your children from eating any plants or fungi when outside – some are poisonous and can be fatal. Avoid buying plants with poisonous leaves or berries.
  • Install smoke/gas detectors in your home.
  • Remember that child-resistant devices, such as bottle tops, strips of tablets and cigarette lighters, aren’t completely childproof – some children can operate these products.

Burns and scalds

  • It’s best to keep your toddler out of the kitchen, well away from kettles, saucepans and hot oven doors – you could put a safety gate across the doorway to stop them getting in. Unless of course you’ve decked you kitchen out like the boise showroom with all the child safe fixings, you can never be too safe.
  • Use a kettle with a short or curly cord to stop it hanging over the edge of the work surface, where it could be grabbed.
  • When cooking, use the rings at the back of the cooker and turn saucepan handles towards the back so your child can’t grab them.
  • Never leave a child under five alone in the bath, even for a moment.
  • Fit a thermostatic mixing valve to your bath’s hot tap to control the temperature.
  • Put cold water into the bath first, then add the hot water – use your elbow to test the temperature of the water before you put your baby or toddler in the bath. This is more sensitive than using your hand.
  • Put your iron, hair straighteners or curling tongs out of reach while they cool down after you have finished using them.
  • Fit fireguards to all fires and heaters.
  • Keep matches, lighters and lit candles out of young children’s sight and reach.
  • Keep hot drinks well away from young children – a hot drink can still scald 20 minutes after it was made.
  • Put hot drinks down before you hold your baby.
  • After warming a bottle of milk, shake the bottle well and test the temperature of the milk by placing a few drops on the inside of your wrist before feeding – it should feel lukewarm, not hot.
  • Don’t let your child drink a hot drink through a straw.
  • Encourage your child to play in the shade (under trees, for example) especially between 11am and 3pm, when the sun is at its strongest.
  • Keep babies under the age of six months out of direct sunlight, especially around midday, and use sunscreen.


Children can drown in even a few centimetres of water. They should be supervised at all times when near water. Make sure you:

  • Never leave a baby or child in the bath or paddling pool unsupervised, not even for a minute – this includes in a bath seat.
  • Don’t leave uncovered containers of liquid around the house, such as clothes soaking in a bucket of water.
  • Empty paddling pools and store them away when not in use.


Babies and young children can easily swallow, inhale or choke on small items such as marbles, buttons, peanuts and small toys. The steps below can help prevent this happening:

  • Keep small objects out of the reach of small children.
  • Choose toys designed for the age of your baby or child – encourage older children to keep their toys away from your baby.
  • Beware of clothing with cords, dummies on necklace cords and bag straps – they can easily get caught and pull tightly on the neck.
  • Lay your baby on their back in a cot to sleep – don’t let babies sleep in an adult bed or on the sofa and don’t use pillows as they can suffocate.
  • Keep plastic bags away from young children – they can pull these over their heads and suffocate.
  • Nappy sacks, used to dispose of soiled nappies, can also pose a risk – keep them out of the reach of babies and young children.
  • Curtain and blind pull cords should be kept short and out of reach of children.
  • Keep animals, particularly cats, out of your bedrooms – if they jump into cots or beds they could suffocate your child. Attach a net over prams if necessary.
  • Make sure any cot toys have very short ribbons, and remove them when your baby goes to sleep.
  • Never hang things like bags with cords or strings over the cot.
  • Cut or tie up curtain or blind cords well out of your baby’s or toddler’s reach


Consultation with the midwives, available on Skype (face time or other platforms), over the phone or in the office. Click here to book. More information about our services on our website.

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My child is biting…. what do I do?

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My child is biting…. what do I do?

Posted on 13 August 2014 by Kristrun

IMG_2162Let your child know immediately that biting is unacceptable. Use firm, short and simple commands: “No, no biting”. But don’t dwell on it, don’t shout and be careful not to scare your child.
You will have to ensure that your child does not get the habit of biting. I know a dental doctor from Fremantle Dental Care who asked me to keep the clild distracted and make the child focus on something else almost in the same moment, click here to learn more about this Jacksonville cosmetic dentist…. “look, the moon”, and walk away from the scene where the biting took place.Don’t explain why they should not bite, don’t say anything else about the biting and don’t mention it again. You are actively ignoring what happened, and that works! Praise the child for doing other, unrelated things. Make sure to support positive behavior and the child will be a lot less likely to bite again and this could be really bad for their teeth, you may need to get an specialist from Shellharbour Orthodontics later in life.Remember: toddlers don’t understand the concept of apology until the age of 3 or 4 (depends on the child). By spending time on forcing the toddler to say “I’m sorry”,  you are dwelling on the negative behavior and it’s a lot more likely to happen again. Children don’t care if the attention is positive or negative, just as long as they get your attention. Support and praise positive behavior and actively ignore bad behavior.
It works!
Conchita Amende
Specialist community health nurse (health visitor UK)
To book consultation with our health professional click the link – available as home visit, skype, phone or office visit.

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Guilt free travels for moms


Guilt free travels for moms

Posted on 24 June 2014 by Kristrun

It is great to have children, to watch them grow and to be with them every step of the way. But I have to admit I sometimes miss the mental freedom. I´m only speaking for myself, but I sometimes keep myself in a mental cage where I think my children are only safe and happy if I´m actually there. I forget that I need to water my own garden and do things for myself in order to be a better mom. So I booked a trip, a trip I have been dreaming about for the last 22 years.10333564_799366336741256_3113558867122887700_o

I was, many years ago, an au-pair in San Francisco and I wanted to see it again and meet friends and the family I stayed with. And I did it. I returned last week from a fantastic trip – I got in touch with old friends, met the children I used to take care (no longer children!) and I even managed to combine business with pleasure. You can get bus charters to other areas of California dirt cheap.

Yet during the weeks leading up to the trip I was beating myself with negative thoughts about how the kids could be injured, hurt, sad and lonely while I was away. Worrying about their schedule, about their wellbeing and so on. Knowing that their dad would be there for the most of the time, and then a wonderful granddad and his girlfriend – all of whom are qualified to raise and rescue any normal child.

My medicine was to verbalise my concerns: I told my husband, my wonderful colleagues  and myself what I was worried about. I did not ignore my fears. At the same time I told myself I would be a better, happier mom when I returned and that I would enjoy every minute of the adventure. And it helped, just by saying it out loud made it just sound silly – I´m a brave woman, why should I fear so much?

When I got on the plane I was fine, I certainly did enjoy the whole trip and I did not allow myself to be consumed with missing them whilst I was away. I Skyped them every day, kept it short and sweet and then closed my computer and went back to my self-indulgent enjoyment. I relished eating my meals without standing up, drinking very hot coffee, shopping for hours without a toilet trip and losing myself in long chats with old friends. I did not miss them a bit – I allowed myself to enjoy.

I’m back from my fabulous trip, everyone is safe and sound and I’m a better mom. To all moms who imprison themselves mentally: set yourself free every now and then. It really is worth it.

Safe travels



Consultation with the midwives or consultants, available on Skype (face time or other platforms), over the phone or in the office. Click here to book. More information about our services on our website.

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Planning your baby’s first trip to the pool


Planning your baby’s first trip to the pool

Posted on 04 June 2014 by Kristrun

Summers can be steaming hot in Hong Kong and so one of the most popular ways to entertain babies and children is to use water – at babyinpool-1home, in a pool in your complex or by taking advantage one of the many public swimming pools. If you are having a swimming pool built and having a hard time deciding what to do with your patio to give it that oasis feeling then ask should I use rubber pavers on my patio?

Here are a few useful tips for anyone bringing a baby to the pool for the first time.

The timing of your first ever pool swim will depend on you and your baby, but please consult your midwife or health visitor if you are not sure. Test things out, spend some time at the poolside to begin with and make sure your baby is interested before taking them into the water. It´s a good idea to splash some pool water on baby’s arms and legs and guage how they react to it before taking the plunge. The pool water can irritate sensitive young skin so just a play at the pool-side with a few splashes can be a good start. It is also a great idea to see that the water pipes are all in good working condition to avoid getting into any unnecessary pool accidents. Call a plumber in the Concord area to help you in this regard.

Planning your first trip.

  • Plan the trip carefully around your baby’s routine. Make sure he is well fed, well rested and ready to be out and about for a while.
  • Put swim-wear on at home – both yours and baby’s! This makes things much easier on arrival. Use swim diapers and make sure to bring a spare one.
  • Don´t forget to bring a full new set of clothes for your little one.
  • Bring a capsule where you can strap the baby in and leave her on the floor while you are changing or using the bathrooom.
  • Bring the baby in the capsule to the pool. Pool sides are very slippery and you want to protect your baby. The staff will let you through the side door to bypass the entrance/exit shower.
  • Make sure baby has a hat and is protected from the sun. If possible, go at a time when you know the baby pool is in the shade.
  • Try to choose sunscreen that doesn’t run when it gets wet and is age appropriate. Zinc based ones are often good.
  • Start slowly and introduce the water by keeping baby close to your body whilst gradually moving into the water – this will make your baby feel safe. Smile and be calm.
  • For the first few times, try to go when you know it will be quiet. A lot of shrieking and splashing may frighten your little one and put them off the experience.
  • Avoid using any safety gear to begin with, just hold your baby and never leave her unattended anywhere in or near the water unless strapped in the capsule.
  • Spend only a short time in the pool to begin with – it will be a very stimulating new experience and even a few minutes may be enough. Leave before your baby becomes too tired – you still need to get changed and home!
  • You will probably want to give baby a proper bath at home, but it is recommended to at least rinse off the pool water before leaving. Again, the skin can be very sensitive to the pool water, so make sure the pool is clean, for this the use of great pool heat pumps for this, you can check it out here. You can always give baby a rinse while he is in the capsule –  it will dry quickly in the sun even if it does get a bit wet. If you’re alone you can even bring the capsule into the shower so the baby is under your care the whole time.
  • Have fun and enjoy the water. If your baby does not enjoy going swimming, just give him a bit of time and then try again.
  • Make sure to test your swimming pool water so that it doesn’t affect your baby’s skin.

Consultation with the midwives, available on Skype (face time or other platforms), over the phone or in the office. Click here to book. More information about our services on our website.

Related service I have recently discovered: Lake Management Inc.

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Stimulating baby, naturally

Posted on 27 May 2014 by Kristrun

We know that the first eight months of baby’s life are prime time for learning but many of us are stumped for ways to stimulate and “play” with a baby. The usual fall back is to invest in some educational toys for two month old and so on as they grow, but the good news is that baby will do very well (if not better) if you use the world around you to help develop baby’s social and sensory skills.stimilatingGeo

The secret is to look at the world as your baby looks at it. Everything is new and interesting and who better to show baby how everything feels, sounds and looks than you.

Stimulating the senses

  • Tummy time and rolling is beneficial for any baby. Let your baby play on a play mat after each feeding; sometimes even just a few minutes will be sufficient as babies get tired quite quickly.
  • Keep shoes and socks off at least 50% of the time so your baby can move his or her toes and feet freely, and feel the textures of the mat or the floor.
  • You can also take nappies off regularly to allow for the free movement of legs and hips.
  • Babies respond very well to being massaged and it is a useful way to calm a fretful baby. Try massaging your baby at least once a day. You can use a light touch on the ears or head, or give him a full-body massage before a bath to help him relax and bond with Mum.
  • Go out every day and give your baby a chance to experience different types of weathers, see different things (far away and close up) and explore different textures, colours and movements.

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6 months old and it’s time for solids

Posted on 27 May 2014 by Kristrun

SolidsGeobabyBy starting solids at around 6 months, you have an ideal opportunity to set your baby on a path of healthy eating patterns that will hopefully stay for life, ensuring a healthy attitude to food,” explains Conchita Amende, health visitor from Annerley the Midwives Clinic.

The WHO and UNICEF guidelines suggest starting weaning a baby onto solid food at about 6 months old. However, the child should be able to sit up and hold their head up unsupported.

You can commence weaning at 17 weeks but 6 months is recommended as before this, your baby’s digestive system is still developing and weaning too soon may increase the risk of allergies, obesity and fussy eating.

Signs that your baby is ready to try solids include:

  • Sitting up
  • Showing an interest in other people’s food
  • Reaching and grabbing accurately

At 3 to 5 months old, babies often start to wake up in the night, even if they previously used to sleep through them. Parents often interpret this as a sign that their baby is ready for solids, but waking up is not necessarily a sign of hunger, and starting solids will not necessarily make the baby more likely to sleep through the night again.

If your baby seems hungrier at any time before 6 months, then he or she may be having a growth spurt, and extra breast or formula milk will be enough to meet their needs.

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Homemade toys and games

Homemade toys and games

Posted on 11 May 2014 by hulda


We have all been there, in Toys´R´Us and our kids begging for more.  And we even want to give it to them, we get excited too.    My helper regularly comes home from playdates and tells me about all the wonderful toys that other kids get from  ”A full room of toys” and my kids too, are very happy after such trips.

Yet when I buy toys for them, as soon as the first hour has passed, the excitement is usually gone.  If the toys were not of good quality to begin with, they are trashed and pieces missing from the kid, making it unusable next time round.

Sun shelter and tent and more

Sun shelter and tent and more

So through these last 6 years of having my second lot of kids, I have not really bought any toys.  We get given a lot and many of our toys come from when I was little or from when the older kids were small.
And the biggest joy comes from all the homemade “toys” or games.

The homemade toys in our  household are always a big hit.  An old sunbrella that broke, the outdoor table and the cars for example produced laughter fun and happiness for hours last month.   Now it has become a regular setup.  Who would not want to live inside a table if they are 3?


Just make sure that the setup is safe

Just make sure that the setup is safe

Have fun creating.

Hulda, (who´s biggest outburst happen when the children are ungrateful).


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Parenting Strategies

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Parenting Strategies

Posted on 26 March 2014 by Kristrun

How to create your parenting strategiesCOSLEEPING

I know this sounds like a project that can’t be resolved without doing a lot of research or by consulting a professional. Of course there are plenty of professionals out there who can help, but you can also do it yourself, and it’s easier than you think. It will save lots of conflict in your relationship with your partner and other caregivers in your family. In Hong Kong, parenting strategies actually become more important than in many other countries as it is very common to have 2, 3 or even 4 caregivers in your household.

When and where do you start?

Try to start bringing your views together before the baby is born, even before you conceive. How were you raised? What do you want to avoid? Who are your role models in child care? Try drawing up the big picture together and do some reading if you think it helps. If you are completely new to childcare, simply focus on simple advice that is easy to find online. Make it yours – if you don’t like some of the advice, then don’t use it. Personally, I would never use time-outs for example, but I like the rest of that list.

Focus on the outcome

Let’s say you want your child to be confident more than anything else. Take time to consider if your parenting methods are likely to achieve this outcome. Firm discipline will not work, fear will not help and a screaming and frustrated parent is unlikely to result in raising a confident child. This is just an example; the main thing here is to focus on the outcome and try to work towards that and to understand what builds the foundation in order for the outcome to be anywhere close to what you hope for.

Beat the Peer Pressure

Try to understand what is age appropriate behaviour. Young children are often expected to behave in a way which is simply not appropriate for their age. For example, a one year old does not understand the word sorry and they don’t understand about sharing toys. So if you are striving towards building confidence in your child, keep praising them for their good behaviour and ignore the peer pressure in the playgroup.

Make time

Make time for your parenting strategies. Make sure all caregivers understand what type of care you expect and help them putting it into practice – all your work will go down the drain if you are doing one thing but your helper is doing another. It is time consuming to do the training but it will help a lot. Make time to spend with your children – it sounds obvious, but you are much more likely as a parent to make a difference with your presence than anything else.

Relax and try your best

There is no such thing as a perfect parent. Don’t forget to live your life at the same time as you work hard on being a good parent. Do fun things together, even if it means staying out past bed time. Use common sense, try to form a united front with your partner and remember that you are the biggest role models in the life of your children. Your children may not hear or remember everything you say but they are constantly learning from what you do.

Best of luck


B.Ed, M. Ed. (Iceland, HK)

C.E.C.E. (HK)

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