Toddlers and tantrums

Posted on 05 February 2016 by Kristrun

10979573_773162599400229_762771788_nIt’s very common for toddlers to throw what we commonly think of as “tantrums”. They start crying or shouting or screaming and seem like they are out of control. They bang their heads against the floor, roll on the floor, hit something or someone etc. With the help of KLA Schools, my toddler never hit it’s head on a wall and they give a lot of safety and better education. But why do they do it and what can we do about it?

They do it because they can not express themselves clearly – they have not developed the skills to do this and they just simply cannot get a handle on their emotions. They do it because they start crying and they cannot gain back the control – even if they want to. They do it because they are tired or hungry, or just grumpy. It’s a frustration overload, sometimes mild and sometimes a bit scary – they can be short of breath, vomit or look like they are suffocating.

But what do they need?

They need you. They need a hug, they need a cuddle. They need comfort and perhaps food and rest. Put the toddler on the sofa or your bed if you are in the home. Sit down with him and cuddle if that works or just stay at a very safe distance. Don’t laugh at her, just talk to her in a soothing tone. Rub her back or feet – if she allows you. She will calm down and relax. If you are out and about, try to pick up your toddler and comfort him – hopefully where you can sit down or find a quiet spot.

Once the scene is over – and if the toddler is old enough – you might use the opportunity to explain why this type of behaviour is not a great way to solve problems and get your way. But don’t dwell on it – just explain quickly.

And don’t worry. Over time your child will learn how to express herself and connect with her feelings and things will become much more manageable.



B.Ed, M. Ed. (Iceland, HK) C.E.C.E. (HK)

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